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Writer's pictureDenise Dowling

Mindset Shift

Updated: Jun 9, 2023

Chills hover on my neck as I pass by the checkout lanes. Someone is following me. I turn, heading down the closest aisle. So does he. I move to the left. He follows suit. My pace quickens. He matches my steps. My pulse races while thinking of my options.

I consider aborting the evening trip and returning home, but the thought of a nine-year-old boy without what he needs for tomorrow’s fieldtrip strengthens my resolve to push forward. Single moms embrace a superhero determination when it comes to their kids, especially since it has only been a few weeks since the loss of their dad.

Shallow breathing signals the intensity of my fear. The sight of the customer service desk and nearby restrooms reveals my way of escape. Surely he won’t follow me into the ladies’ room. If he does, the workers will notice. I pass the service desk and quickly push open the restroom door.

He follows.

Terror rushes through my veins at the sound of a male voice behind me.

“Ma’am? Ma’am? This is the men’s room.”

Gathering my wits, I contend, as I pass by him, “I know that.”

Speculation can rattle the best of us, especially those with vivid imaginations. It’s easy to leap to less than the best conclusions. There are definite times to be on our guard, but sometimes we need to be more like Bob Goff. I’ve heard him mention this multiple times on his Dream Big Podcast. Give people the benefit of the least creepy explanation.

Do you question the motives of people around you? We all do. But with practice we can begin to train our minds to expect the best instead of the worst. How would this change your thought life? How would it change your outlook? How would it impact the lives of those who are closest to you? Could this simple act increase our love for others?


Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (I Cor. 13:4-7 NIV).


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dbrentbarnard
Jun 13, 2023

I needed to hear this! I always say that the Enemy's predictable strategy is to compromise our relationship with God, others, and our relationship with ourselves - and this is an example of how cynical seeds can be sown in our hearts as we (too quickly) judge others - distancing us from them. So often we judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their actions - even when those actions are innocent - as here! Truly the world isn't as dark as the media (and our own fears) can lead us to believe.

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Unknown member
Jun 15, 2023
Replying to

So true, Brent. I'm glad this post was helpful.:)

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J.D. Wininger
J.D. Wininger
Jun 13, 2023

Enjoyed your post ma'am. Most humans are naturally "wired" to be suspicious. I think it's a part of our fight or flight response. Loved your admonition to move from being "like the world" to being "like Christ." Well said author!

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Unknown member
Jun 13, 2023
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Thank you. So glad you enjoyed the post!

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Unknown member
Jun 13, 2023

Sounds like that was a powerful moment for you this morning where you leaned on the Lord to control your thoughts. I'm so thankful that this blog is an encouragement to you. Thanks for sharing!

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Linda Leinberger
Linda Leinberger
Jun 12, 2023

I enjoyed this post Denise! After taking a bite of spicy hot breakfast this morning all of a sudden I felt a rush to my head and was not sure if I was going to pass out. I immediately ask the LORD to steady my thoughts as what to do. The first thing I did was take a drink of cool water…. then I looked at our promise for today. It said this…The Lord has a purpose for you to fulfull, the power to equip you, and strength to uphold you. So I begin to repeat these last to phrases over and over and my brain leveled out. I realized the spicy bite had really effected me and I beg…

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